The Zulu proverb Ubuntu means:
I am a person through other people. My humanity is tied to yours.
In other words, I am, because you are.
*****
I sit in the theatre, Nick to my left and my niece to my right. This moment has been years in the making.
The fact that I survived to witness this is a testament to that desire we all feel – that intense drive to survive.
Or my stubborn nature.
Either way, I am here. Sitting in the dark with those I love, about to replay, relive, and witness the most painful moments of my life.
*****
Early on, Nick decided to film what was happening. If you ask him why he did it, he will say it was because he knew he was witnessing something and wasn’t sure how it would end.
How was it going to end?
I think Nick turned on the camera because he found a way to cope through a creative lens.
As a witness to an unfolding story, Nick captured it as it happened.
To one day retell it and ensure that no matter what, there would be a legacy for Mark Wilson and Cody Halfpenny –and for me.
*****
The film opens with my first words:
They’re taking out my heart.
Let that sink in.
To keep me alive, they needed to remove the malignancy that was killing me.
That malignancy was my own heart.
I would only survive if a grieving family were willing to say Yes to donating their loved one’s organs.
Twice.
Through their unfathomable pain, I would be granted an extension to my life.
Gratitude is too small a word.
*****
So I was in a dark theatre watching myself on screen, broken, delirious, smiling, devastated, beautiful, alive.
Listening to the reactions and feeling the emotions of those in the theatre was a singular experience.
Nicks’s raw, emotional, and beautiful creation took us on an intense journey. From what it’s like living with advanced heart failure, what the wait for a heart is like, bearing witness to the transplant miracle, and what can happen afterwards.
They gasped, cried out, wept, and were silent.
Then they cheered.
They cheered for Nick. They cheered for Mark, for Cody, for me. For all involved in transplant.
I think they left feeling transformed and forever changed.
They left with a call to action for opt-out programs worldwide and that we need more research on life after transplant.
And many signed up to let their wishes be known.
*****
I am a person through other people. My humanity is tied to yours.
I am, because my donors are.
I am, because my donor families are.
I am, because my doctors and nurses are.
I am, because Nick and my family and friends are.
I am, because you are—all of you.
Because. Ubuntu.
